What I (Re-)Learned From My 25th Year of Teaching...

That I Should Have Never Forgotten 

(Part 2)

My ability to teach is a gift.

I believe God has gifted me with an ability to teach. Sometimes I have difficulty acknowledging this, thinking that it seems like an arrogant thing to say. But it seems more arrogant to say that I have not been given the gift and I have figured out how to do it on my own. Seeing the ability to teach as a gift helps me understand two things:

• First, my ability to teach is not something that I have developed myself out of nothing. I have not willed myself into being a good teacher, it is by God’s grace that I have developed my gift to become a good teacher. If I did not start with the gift of teaching, I would be a horrible teacher because I would be totally dependent on developing a talent that I did not have, which seems almost impossible to do.
• Second, I have been given the gift with the expectation that I will do something good with the gift. Gifts of talents are different than other gifts (like new clothes or flowers or fruitcake), in that there is an expectation to use the gift to glorify God. The gift is not for my pleasure, it is my tool to be used for God’s pleasure. If I choose not to use my gift, than I am dishonoring God. If I refuse to acknowledge the gift that God has given me (which is really a false kind of humility), than I am denying that God has given me a gift and I am insulting God. It is like refusing to open a present, and because I never opened the present I say that I never received it. 

So, I realized (again), this year, that God has given me a gift - the ability to teach. I am not delusional enough to believe that he has made me the best teacher, but I also know he gives good gifts and to say I stink at teaching while acknowledging that I have been given the gift of teaching, would be foolishness. God does not give bad gifts. If I stink at teaching it is because I am doing something wrong that is messing up the good gift that God has given. At times, this year, I have messed up the good gift that God has given me. My problem has been two-fold:

• First, I forgot that my ability to teach is a wonderful gift from God. I never denied it, I just didn’t think about it and it didn’t impact me on a practical level. I depended too much on myself and forgot that it is only by God’s grace that I am any good at this at all. When I depended on myself, I failed to involve God in the very thing that he gave me. When I depended on myself, I never did as well as I should have done, I put more pressure on myself than I needed to, and I started to deny my gift. It is a vicious cycle that causes frustration and bitterness and it is only in remembering that teaching is my gift from God, that I can break out of that cycle.
• Second, I forgot that I have been given the gift to bring him glory - it is not for my glory or for the glory of anyone else. Too often I looked for glory for myself and too often I looked for praises from those in more powerful positions than mine. When I did not receive what I hoped for or sometimes felt I deserved, the cycle of frustration and bitterness would continue. But when I use my gift for god’s glory, the praises of others matters less. If I know I am bringing God glory by how I am using my gift, than the criticism is more bearable and the lack of praise or recognition is inconsequential. 

“Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving.”
Colossians 3:23-24

I have come to understand that I can teach math to middle school students and bring glory to God at the same time, but not if I do not include God in the process and not if I forget that God has given me the gift to teach in the first place. I bring glory to God in my teaching when I understand that teaching is far more than just disseminating facts. I will be a good teacher when my students understand that I care about them, not just their ability to do math. Good teachers care and have compassion and are interested in the humanness of their students. And isn’t that how we bring glory to God, by loving those around us, especially those entrusted to our care; those entrusted to us to teach? I don’t need to teach the Bible to bring God glory (although I can certainly do that too), I just need to love those that he has put in my path. Love can be expressed in many ways, and we have all been given gifts by which we can express love. Some do it with hammer and nails, some do it with music, some do it in conversation, or in knitting, or in baking or in medical care. We are all given gifts through which we express God’s love and bring him glory - mine is in teaching. 

May I not forget my gift in year 26 or any year after. I pray that I will use my gift wisely and that there will never be doubt in my students’ minds that their math teacher cares more about them then their ability to do math.