Sides - Part 3

Virtually everyone has seen the picture by now - a small Honduran child, crying while her mother is patted down by a border patrol agent. It has become a symbol in the debate over the separation of children from their parents who have crossed the U.S. borders illegally…

Only its not...

In fact it is a picture of things done right. Mother and daughter were not separated, the border patrol agent was dutifully and expediently making sure the mother was safe, and, as far as I have been able to determine, due process was followed as compassionately as any legal process can be. Despite this, the photo is indelibly etched into the American mind as representative of the evils created by the Trump administration, even being edited and manipulated by Time magazine to further inflame the debate. 

This is where we have landed in American “journalism,” politics, and culture. Truth is relative and open to manipulation for the sake of a “greater” end. While the photographer freely admits that he saw nothing wrong in the case of the Honduran family at the border, he also sees no harm in using his photo to bring attention to the issue of separating parents and children who have crossed the border illegally (even though the photo has little to do with that specific issue). I would guess that most who are adamantly opposed to the current immigration practices and are frothing at the mouth in their hatred of Trump, would readily agree with the photographer and this current practice, never mind that, in the name of compassion, they are manipulating, for the sake of their own political agenda, a vulnerable mother and daughter who have no say in how their images are being used. Of course ardent Trump supporters are quick to call out the hypocrisy, but more than happy to participate in equivalent manipulation and distortion when they feel it can work in their favor.

Unfortunately we have become a nation, a culture, that eats this stuff like candy. We are willing to accept almost anything as long as it supports our cause. Truth is secondary, defending and promoting our point of view is primary. It is the same mentality that searches for and posts on social media, absurd comparisons between our current political climate and Nazi Germany. Comparing the desire for reasonable gun control measures to the forcible removal of weapons from German citizens during the rise of Hitler’s power, is, at best, unhelpful and disrespectful. Likewise, a picture of a facility housing detained children shown next to pictures of a Nazi prison camp is a ludicrous comparison. Both cases do not promote honest, well intentioned debate, they play on emotional distortions of the truth. They do not do anything to help solve the issues they are addressing. In fact, if anything, they are further inflaming both sides with twists of misinformation, widening the divide, and making healthy discourse even more difficult. 

Healthy discourse is difficult, though. Reposting distortions of the truth that vilify our opponents is much easier. Researching facts is far more difficult than simply repeating unverified statistics. Pointing fingers and assigning blame is far easier than working toward solutions. Closing our minds and digging into our position requires less effort than finding common ground and compromise. Reducing problems to self righteous Facebook memes is more satisfying than sorting through the intricate complications of an issue. 

Unfortunately, it seems, we have learned from from our “leaders” who have demonstrated an unfathomable inability to accomplish much of anything on the immigration front for as long as I have followed politics. Countless leaders have promised reform and despite periods of time when one party has controlled the presidency, the house and the senate, all have failed, miserably, to construct workable changes to our system that address the problems we face. Although I believe Trump has exacerbated the problem through his callousness, it is disingenuous to ignore decades of failure, by both political parties, that have led us to this point. It is equally disingenuous to believe that the likes of Nancy Pelosi and Charles Schumer, who have been profiting enormously from political life in D.C., for what seems like eternity, are somehow more compassionate than Donald Trump. 

It has become comical, yet painful, to watch politician after politician complain incessantly about politicians on the “other side,” - deriding their character, questioning their motives, assigning them blame, calling them names, and exaggerating their position - and then wonder aloud why they won’t make more effort to “cross the aisle” to work together. It is classical sabotage before ever beginning. It is entrenchment that prevents progress. And we have learned from them. In our own ways we mimic their juvenile behavior by eagerly insulting those who disagree with us. We exaggerate the positions of our adversaries. We question motives, resort to name calling and disparage their character, then we wonder aloud why we can’t solve problems (which really means we wonder why others won’t change their minds and agree with us).

And so here we are, saddled with a problem created by decades of ineptitude by our leaders, trying to eliminate the problem with oversimplified solutions, possibly the most absurd of which is, “they should all just enter the United States legally.” While saying that we should simply stop separating families sounds compassionate and logical, it is, just as much, an overly simple statement. You can’t stop doing one thing unless there is an alternative to do something else instead. Keeping families together is certainly the ideal, but where and how, while still enforcing the law, compassionately and with integrity, is complicated - almost as complicated as trying to immigrate legally into the United States. The sooner we realize there are no easy solutions and there is no single person, or party, or organization, or single anything, to blame, the sooner there can be civil conversations about compassionate solutions. Angry social media posts may increase attention to issues, and bolster the emotional support of our allies, but, ultimately, they seldom produce unifying solutions. 

Here is an idea - maybe we could start doing things different. Perhaps we can set an example for our leaders. Maybe we should start with how we converse with each other on a neighbor to neighbor, Facebook friend to Facebook friend, human to human level. Wouldn’t it be refreshing if we genuinely tried to comprehend the perspective of those we tend to disagree with and searched for common ground? Wouldn’t it be more productive to understand differences of opinion rather than puffing ourselves up by distorting their views? Wouldn’t the presentation of, and the willingness to read and listen to, well documented facts be better than mocking others in a derisive meme? Wouldn’t we all be more compassionate if we acknowledged that we all have a share in the blame and can be a piece (however small it might be) of the solution, instead of constantly shifting the blame and responsibility to someone else? Wouldn’t we all benefit from the pursuit of truth more than entrenchment in our positions? 

Maybe if there are enough of us that demonstrate that the integrity of truth and thoughtful, well intentioned conversation, really matters, our politicians and the media will take notice. Maybe truth will start to be important to them as well. I know it is idealistic, but anger and distortion don’t seem to be serving us very well right now, so maybe it is about time for idealism. Maybe abandonment of truth is a big part of the reason why we are in state we are in. Maybe the great divide that emerges between sides and separates us, isn’t disagreement, maybe it is truth itself.